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What's up with Bill? Part II (Political Satire)

Updated: Sep 9, 2022

I was getting a fence installed in my yard a few weeks ago and as I supervised, Bill, a neighbor, walked by and wondered what I was doing. It didn’t take long before the conversation turns political, especially against the current administration in Washington, D.C. It started with 'Defund the Police' slogan and proceeded to other potentially controversial topics. Mind you, I don't instigate these discussions, somehow, with Bill, they go right to political. Sometimes I resist the temptation and other times, like here, not so much.


Bill, my republican neighbor said, “What about defunding the police? What do all democrats want, a weakened police force? Or perhaps, no police force whatsoever?”


NOW, LET’S GET TO THE FACTS. ACCORDING TO SEVERAL REPUTABLE NEWS SOURCES, ONLY A VERY SMALL PERCENTAGE (<10%) OF DEMOCRATS WANT TO DEFUND THE POLICE. THE MAJORITY OF DEMOCRATS THINK THIS SLOGAN DOESN'T SEND THE RIGHT MESSAGE. INDEED, INSTEAD OF DEFUNDING, MAYBE MORE TRANSPARENCY IN POLICE DEPARTMENTS? SOME ALSO WANT THE POLICE TO BE MORE OPEN AND ACCOUNTABLE TO THEIR CONSTITUENCY. LOGICALLY, IT'S A COMPLICATED ISSUE SO FOR BEST UNDERSTANDING NUANCE AND PERSPECTIVE ARE NECESSARY COMPONENTS.


I ALSO EMPHASIZED MANY POLICE HAVE MUCH MORE RESPONSIBILITY THAN JUST LAW ENFORCEMENT. SOME POLICE OFFICERS WEAR TOO MANY HATS AND TOO MUCH RESPONSIBILITY, SO THEY GET STRETCHED THIN. THE LOCAL MENTAL HEALTH COMMUNITY MAY NEED TO GET MORE INVOLVED IN SUPPORTING THE POLICE. THERE NEEDS TO BE COOPERATION AND COORDINATION BETWEEN BOTH ORGANIZATIONS.

Before I could breathe, Bill said, “Well, Antifa and Black Lives Manner supporters burned down our cities over the last several years."


I WILL NEVER CONDONE PEOPLE SETTING BUILDINGS OR PROPERTY ON FIRE, REGARDLESS OF THEIR POLITICAL BELIEFS. BUT LET’S BE ACCURATE AND HONEST, IN MOST CITIES, BLM PROTESTS WERE JUST CONFINED TO SEVERAL BLOCKS OF DESTRUCTION. STILL NOT CONDONING THIS DESTRUCTION. HOWEVER, TO SAY THESE GROUPS BURNED DOWN THE CITIES IS HYPERBOLE AND IMPRECISE. I GUESS THE PHRASE 'BURNED DOWN THE CITIES' CAN BE INTERPRETED IN MANY WAYS. NOT SURE WHAT IT EXACTLY MEANS?


WE ALSO HAVE TO LOOK CLOSELY AT THE DEMOGRAPHICS OF THESE DEMONSTRATIONS THAT OCCURRED OVER THESE LAST SEVERAL YEARS. INDEED, SOME DEMOCRATS ENGAGED IN ILLEGAL ACTIVITY, BUT THERE WERE ALSO SIGNIFICANT APOLITICAL PEOPLE MERELY INTERESTED IN DESTRUCTION. WHO KNOWS WHAT POLITICAL PARTIES THE PROTESTORS BELONGED TO? WHO KNOWS WHAT POLITICAL PARTIES ALL THOSE INVOLVED IN THE DESTRUCTION BELONGED TO? ISN'T THERE ENOUGH BLAME TO GO AROUND? IT'S EASY TO SAY THIS WAS ONLY DONE BY DEMOCRATS AS BLM IS PART OF THEIR IDEOLOGY. I JUST THINK IT'S TOO EASY TO JUST PAINT WITH A BROAD BRUSH.


He then went to inflation...


I could tell that Bill wanted to complain about high gas prices, but since they’ve been coming down these last few weeks due to a number of factors he decided to move on to inflation. He said, "Brandon doesn’t know what he’s doing with high inflation. I wonder if he knows about the high inflation affecting the middle and lower classes."



REGARDLESS OF THE PERCEIVED MIND OF PRESIDENT BIDEN, HE DOES CARE ABOUT INFLATION. HE'S TOO POLITICALLY ASTUTE NOT TO. HIS ADMINISTRATION IS WORKING DILIGENTLY ON WAYS TO BRING DOWN PRICES.


AS IT'S THE CASE IN TODAY'S GEOPOLITICAL CLIMATE, EXTERNAL FORCES AFFECT GASOLINE, GROCERIES, AND RAW MATERIALS. BECAUSE OF THE CONFLICT IN EUROPE AND OTHER FACTORS, INCLUDING SUPPLY CHAIN ISSUES, THE BIDEN ADMINISTRATION HAS BEEN HANDED A WEAK HAND TO RIGHT THE INFLATION SHIP IN A POSITIVE DIRECTION. SOME PARTISAN INDIVIDUALS FEEL THAT THE CURRENT ECONOMIC SITUATION INSTANTLY CHANGES ONCE A NEW PRESIDENT TAKES OFFICE. THE ECONOMY IS A COMPLICATED MACHINE -- I'M HOPEFUL THAT WE'LL GRADUALLY SEE IMPROVEMENTS AGAINST THE INFLATION MENACE. AGAIN, I SUSPECT THAT BRINGING DOWN INFLATION IS A TOP PRIORITY OF THE BIDEN ADMINISTRATION.


It was only a matter of time before Bill turned to the situation in Mar-o-Lago...


What about the invasive raids in your home are only for Republicans because the democratic party wants no competition; they love to destroy everyone in their way.


I BELIEVE WHAT YOU’RE TRYING TO SAY: ONLY REPUBLICANS ARE HARASSED BY INVASIVE RAIDS IN THEIR HOMES. I BELIEVE THE JUSTICE DEPARTMENT AND FBI HAD BEEN WORKING WITH THE TRUMP OFFICIALS, ESPECIALLY THIS YEAR, TO OBTAIN THESE TOP SECRET DOCUMENTS THAT WERE TAKEN TO MAR-O-LAGO BY TRUMP OFFICIALS. THE JUSTICE DEPARTMENT AND FBI HAD GIVEN THE FORMER PRESIDENT AMPLE OPPORTUNITIES TO RETURN THESE DOCUMENTS. INDEED, IN JUNE OF THIS YEAR, TRUMP OFFICIALS CONFIRMED TO THE JUSTICE DEPARTMENT THAT ALL GOVERNMENT DOCUMENTS HAD BEEN RETURNED TO THEM. THE RAID HAD TO OCCUR SO THESE SENSITIVE DOCUMENTS WERE CONFINED TO A VERY SECURE LOCATION. TO KEEP THESE DOCUMENTS PRIVATE, TRUMP OFFICIALS LEFT THE JUSTICE DEPARTMENT WITH NO OTHER CHOICE BUT TO GET SOME OF THESE SECRETIVE DOCUMENTS BY RAIDING HIS HOME IN FLORIDA.



Now it was time for my neighbor, Bill, to pivot to another issue and talk about it. It began with the corrupt media...


Bill thinks our media is corrupt media that follow orders only from the Democrats. If the media were doing their job, the FBI would have never happened. They (FBI) get a pass. They can shoot you and still get a pass. The FBI needs to be disbanded and disabled.


ACCORDING TO BILL, THE MEDIA IS OVERALL CORRUPT AND ONLY TAKES ORDERS FROM THE DEMOCRATS. IN MY OPINION, BILL SHOULD HAVE SAID THAT ALL MEDIA COVERING THE WHITE HOUSE SHOULD BE LABELED 'CORPORATE MEDIA' INSTEAD OF JUST 'MEDIA.' THE MAJOR MEDIA NEWS COMPANIES ARE IN BUSINESS TO MAKE A PROFIT, HENCE THE TERM CORPORATE. ANYWAY, I DIGRESS, MOST EDUCATED PEOPLE REALIZE CERTAIN NETWORKS LEAN LEFT AND OTHERS LEAN RIGHT.


CORPORATE MEDIA REPRESENTS BOTH SIDES OF THE AISLE, NEITHER PARTY HAS A MONOPOLY IN TERMS OF NATIONAL NEWS COVERAGE. DEPENDING ON YOUR POLITICAL PERSUASION, YOU CAN FIND NEWS THAT MAY GENERALLY ALIGN WITH YOUR VIEWS. HAVING SAID THAT, IT WOULD SEEM HIGHLY PROBABLE THAT THE MEDIA OVERALL WOULD ONLY FOLLOW ORDERS FROM THE DEMOCRATS. THESE LEFT-LEANING NETWORKS MAY BE SUPPORTIVE OF MORE LEFT-LEANING CAUSES, BUT SUPPORT OR PERHAPS CHEERLEADING IS MUCH DIFFERENT THAN TAKING ORDERS. IT'S IMPORTANT TO INCLUDE FOX NEWS AND NEWSMAX IN THIS DISCUSSION, WHO SUPPORT RIGHT-LEANING REPUBLICANS – SO THEORETICALLY, THE POLITICAL DEBATE OCCURS ON BOTH SIDES OF THE MEDIA.


ALSO, WHEN YOU SAID, “THE FBI CAN SHOOT SOMEONE AND GET A PASS,” I THINK THEY MAY BE DESCRIBING THE STABLE GENIUS (DONALD TRUMP). ACCORDING TO CBS NEWS A FEW YEARS AGO, TRUMP WAS QUOTED AS SAYING, “I COULD STAND IN THE MIDDLE OF FIFTH AVENUE AND SHOOT SOMEBODY AND I WOULD LOSE ANY VOTERS, OK?”


His last comment could be considered the 'creme de la creme' of ridiculous comments.


Bill finished by saying, "Demoncrats, always attacking by calling people names. Idiots."


AT THIS POINT, I THINK IT WAS A GOOD TIME TO EXCUSE MYSELF FROM THIS CONVERSATION.







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